Search me, O God, and know my heart. – Psalm 139:23
Many of us know we should examine ourselves first in the
face of conflict. But very few of us do
that. When we find ourselves entangled
in a conflict, we should first ask ourselves, Am I at fault here?
This is hard for us, especially because in most conflicts,
we feel strongly that we are right. And we figure that we should also be
obvious to everyone else.
But in conflict, as wise people know, the fault is rarely completely one-sided.
So, if today you find yourself thinking angry, condemning
thoughts about someone who has done something to you, you may need to take firm
steps to deal with that person. But take
care also to look honestly at your own behavior and feelings. Before you act, ask yourself, What if I’m not seeing the whole picture?
What if, in fact, something in me is also at fault here?
The good news is that God knows us far better than we know
ourselves. God knows “all [our] ways.” Nothing is hidden from God’s eyes.
Even better news is that God, by His Spirit, is actually
able to show us what he sees, to peel away our layers of self-deception, and to
give us 20/20 vision into our heart of hearts.
Would it not be wise, first, to humbly ask God to show us ourselves
accurately, lest we end up, too late, profoundly at fault as well?
